We’ve updated our Terms of Use to reflect our new entity name and address. You can review the changes here.
We’ve updated our Terms of Use. You can review the changes here.

Happy Tribes of Injuns

from Trains Across the Sea by Trains Across the Sea

/

about

Christopher Columbus and a Native American walk into a bar. Hilarity ensues. Also, Americans work too much.

lyrics

Well in fourteen hundred and ninety two Columbus he bent down to tie his shoe, and when he looked up he thought he had found the back end of the world.
Cuz all he could see were mountains and trees and beautiful rivers and lakes and streams, and it felt great to finally find a place untouched by man.
When from out behind those beautiful trees stepped a man so strong and graceful and lean, and Columbus, not knowing where the hell he was, called this man an Injun.
Not unlike a deer that Injun froze and gave Columbus a look from head to toe, just trying to figure out why a man would put that much
Effort just into what he wore

"Why, those fancy shoes won't help you catch your dinner! Nor will that three cornered hat! And how on earth could stockings that tight ever be comfortable?"
"Enough of that," Columbus yelled, "I'm here on business so show me where you dirty, smelly Injuns keep your gold!"
"What's gold?" The powerful Injun asked, and Columbus let out a hearty laugh. And giving a wink to his thugs he said
"Boys, the gold is ours for the taking."
So the Injun went on about his day and caught some fish while Columbus played in his New World Sandbox where he tried to find
The shiniest rock to bring back to his queen

And after five hundred years
Of searching around for gold
Maybe it's time we asked ourselves
"What else could we do with our time?"

Well in fourteen hundred and ninety three Columbus returned to build a colony, as any wise man would know the potential for slave trade here.
And in the name of God and Spain he knew it was time to go and explain to those dirty Injuns the concept of land ownership.
"You see, red people," Columbus began, "What is the true hope of every man is a piece of land to call his own on which no one else can step."
"Why can't we share?," the Injuns screamed, "It's worked for us for centuries!" And Columbus let out a laugh for he knew the Injuns would love it if they would just give it a chance.
For as far as Christopher Columbus could see the Injuns lived in poverty. No marble floors or fancy gowns or other high culture comforts.
"And look how silly they do dance, barefoot around fires in a spiritual trance. Don't they even know a proper, civilized waltz?"
But the Injuns liked their way of life, so much so that they decided to fight. But they fought in the name of freedom and respect instead of God. So they lost.

So Columbus and company have been here for a while and those pesky Injuns have been exiled to those tiny midwestern plots of barren land.
And where once grew those mighty trees with which the Injuns lived in harmony, we've built gray boxes inside of which we sit away our lives.
In front of desks, in front of screens, behind the steering wheels of our dreams. We sit on couches, fat, content, and call this "civilization."
But still we hope for a far off land which appears to us untouched by man, after which learn it's always been filled with Happy Tribes of Injuns.

credits

from Trains Across the Sea, released July 14, 2008

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Trains Across the Sea San Diego, California

Trains Across the Sea is the musical output of Andy Gallagher.

He also co-wrote the trucker musical "SEMI FAME: The Truck Route to Broadway."

contact / help

Contact Trains Across the Sea

Streaming and
Download help

Redeem code

Report this track or account

Trains Across the Sea recommends:

If you like Trains Across the Sea, you may also like: